2012 and Still Single – That’s Hilarious!

by John Davis
Writer, Comedian and Star of Come Date With Me
Friday, 6th January 2012

Ah the fresh breeze of a new year plays gently across my hungover face. The dating travails of last year seem but a distant memory and after my short-lived televisual fame, I feel I’ve settled into the calm twilight of post singledom years.

Actually, bollocks. It’s just the Xanax.

It’s 2012 folks, and loathe as I am to join the general idiocy that greets each new year with an ADHD puppy dog like enthusiasm I must say I’m feeling optimistic. It was last year I began writing this column and, thanks to you folks, it has been great fun and quite successful. Your responses have been, in turn, hilarious, tragic, forlorn, earnest and on occasion, downright illegal and this has made for a really fun year.

But I don’t mean to spend this first column of 2012 writing a review. Onwards and upwards dating folk. The world is your bivalve.

Now obviously many of you made false statements regarding your future – so called resolutions – and I’m sure many of these surrounded the idea of meeting folk and generally attempting to negate your natural cynicism toward meaningful relationships with other humans. Well done. Really. Now forget about them. Not humans. I don’t mean indulge in a little inter-species erotica. I’m talking about forgetting any promises you made about being a better, more optimistic and kinder person. You should be doing that anyway. Instead, let’s have a look at how dating works in the light of other people making resolutions.

Generally, resolutions surround a negation – not doing something or giving something up. Almost always these revolve around health: emotional, physical and sexual. The problem for the liberated single is that many, previously sane single folk have fallen under the holiday spell and have managed, particularly if they attended an orphan’s christmas, to find themselves in a decidedly ill advised coupling with someone they hardly know and like even less. A combination of booze, loneliness, other people’s happiness and a more general narcissism thrusts many into the arms of their very own midnight cowboy. Society has brainwashed us into thinking that, kissless lips at midnight mean eternal spinster/batchelorism.

I’m here to tell you IT”S NOT TRUE! January is a month of recovery. It’s not time to throw your proverbial (and maybe real) eggs in one dual basket. Take your time. Slowly restock your seretonin. Indulge in light, casual activities with minimal emotional impact and maximum hormonal benefit. In other words, be nice to yourself and have slow, detoxing fun. Check your horoscopes. I bet they mention nothing about finding true love, or lust, in January. Cursory love or lust is fine of course. Just don’t dive too deep.

With this in mind, I’m going to use this for a shameless bit of self-promotion. You see, according to research endorphins are really, really good for you. And one of the best ways to release endorphins into the body is through laughter. As a result I’m inviting you to come and help me help you laugh. Sunday 15th January I’m hosting a new concept in the singles game. An afternoon of meeting, networking, flirting and laughter. From 2pm 100 singles split evenly by gender will gather at the Phoenix in London’s Cavendish Square for an hour of cocktails and meetin’ ‘n greetin’ followed by two hours of comedy with 5 of London’s finest comics. After that, the venue is our own as we continue TFI Sunday as late as you like. If you’ve been to one of Original Dating’s mid-week socials before, imagine that but with a two-hour comedy show thrown into the mix. And it’s a Sunday afternoon so no worries about work the next day.

Get down there, have a giggle, meet some folk and giggle some more.

Just call me Dr John.

• TFI Sunday
• 2pm Sunday 15th January
• The Phoenix, Cavendish Square
• MC John Davis
• 5 of London’s top comic talents
• 100 of you

Click here to book your place!

topic tags: christmas, come date with me, new year, parties, relationships, social networking, speed dating, wine

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about the author

Like a modern day Moses, John Davis (formerly Jay Sivad) was rescued from under a bushel by the Dating Trail team. Cleansed of his past as a serious journalist, John emerged, the proverbial butterfly, as the country's leading dating writer. He's got practical skills too and can attest to being nation's most experienced dating host having run over 250 speed dating events for Original Dating. A stand up comedian, radio host, philosopher (it's true! He has the paperwork) and budding media personality (Channel Four's Come Date With Me), Jay turns a wry eye on the travails of modern dating and its participants.

John writes regularly for Dating Trail. If you'd like to be be first to find out about his next installment then please follow us on Twitter or 'Like' our Facebook page for updates.

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